Waiting for Savasana

I was Waiting To Take It…

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The Tamoxifen.  I was waiting until I felt a little better.  But last night, I had nightmares all night because I hadn’t started taking it and really, my brain knows I need to do it.

So I took it tonight for the first time.

Tamoxifen has some crappy possible side effects but you know what would be worse than side effects?  Metastasis.

Physically, I am feeling better than I was but still not great.  I am about 60%.  Honestly.  60% and I feel better now than I have in awhile.  That’s saying something.

Tomorrow I have an appointment with the “Survivorship” person.  It says online she is a nurse practitioner.  I don’t think she is the caseworker I spoke with a little over a month ago but it says it is a return visit so maybe I have already met her but don’t remember?

It’s funny.  I don’t remember much of the summer.  The four AC chemos I had were really tough on my brain.  The Taxol was tough on my body but I remember more of that time even though I felt horrible.

I am tired of talking about how horrible I feel…how tired I am.

I am impatient for recovery.

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