My tongue hurts. It feels like strep throat in my mouth. I can’t even really talk.
But, I promised my son I would play Legos with him and I actually did it for a good ten minutes. That is a big deal. To show what a great Mom I am (ha ha) I have to tell you that even at my best, I do not enjoy playing Legos. Blech Legos. But it means a lot to my kid so I fake it till I make it when I can…and it made him really happy.
So, I played but then the oncology nurse called (BTW she called within 10 minutes of me emailing my oncologist with my concerns; Seriously, my oncologist ROCKS) and filled me in on how to treat my poor sore mouth. And I got a Lego reprieve. Apparently this mouth stuff is a 10 day effect of Adriamycin and it is indeed ten days since my last chemo. I got some rinses and whatnot but what helped the most was a good old pain killer. Next time they will give me less of The Red Devil. So that’s kind of good. Silver linings.
In other news, I am looking for a summer camp for the little guy for the week of July 8. I have him on two wait lists. I actually cried to one of the camp customer service people and used the chemo card and I wasn’t trying to be manipulative or anything. I’m just so upset that I have to farm my kids out so they are not stuck hanging out with terrible me. And talking about going to get chemo makes me cry anyway. Anyway, my kids have been going to this particular camp for seven years… that’s pretty loyal in my book so I am hoping the camp can help me out. I found an awesome camp for the eldest that week in which he goes to a different animal themed locale every day: a horse ranch, an aquarium, a zoo, etc. I can’t find anything like that for the youngest that doesn’t have a waitlist. I am getting frustrated. Let me know if you have a lead…he’s going to be a third grader. He needs to be in camp that week.
We are hanging in there as always. And I am glad to be 41. Very different from last year. Although last year I was in Paris without my children so that was good. Still, last year, I was bummed to be turning 40. I can tell you right now, that feeling will never happen again. I also don’t think I will ever be without my children again on my birthday if i can help it. Breast cancer has put all that into perspective. Every year from here on out is a gift. And when I blew out my candle tonight my one and only wish is that I get to blow out another next year, surrounded by my three wonderful boys. I just want to be 42. I just want to be 48. I just want to be 50, 57, 63, 100! I promise you, TIME, it’s what I want. In fact, it’s the only thing I will ever wish for again.