So I last left you in the wacky er waiting room that truly felt like a three ring circus. After some time, we were escorted to a room where we explained what had been happening the last six months. I even pulled a note pad out and showed them the difference in my handwriting over the last three months. All agreed it was weird. I mentioned that I had breast cancer 11 years earlier. I did not notice a reaction of any kind. I just thought they should know, so they did a bunch of tests and an eye exam and some other stuff and then finally they sent me for an MRI. I have to tell you…I kinda knew what they were going to find. I hoped I was wrong. I’ve been trying to be more optimistic in my everyday life. The technician was very nice. Happy, jolly, pleasant. It was a comfort, as if his cheery disposition would cushion the blow. He asked me what kind of music I wanted to listen to. I said something relaxing. I think I ended up with Olivia Newton John and other selections of popular music from the late 70’s/ early 80’s. Reminded me of my childhood. It was fine.

They finished the scan and cheerily wheeled me back to my room in the ER. And what happened next was like an episode of ER! Very dramatic! Grab your tissues!

The ER doctor came in and he said something to the effect of…and I am mostly paraphrasing:

I don’t have much of a background in radiology but that scan did not look good. You got a bunch of stuff in you brain. Like tumors! A bunch of them. It does not look good for you.

This is the part I remember so I will put it in quotes.

“You need to get your affairs in order.”

Well, yikes. That’s not good, is it? Nope, not good at all.

Tumors in my brain. Too many to count and my brain was swelling and two of the many tumors were sitting right on my frontal lobes. This was bad.

He made some apologies about my situation. I replied that I got eleven years of no evidence of disease and I got to see my boys grow up. What else could I ask for?

But I still wanted more.

Wouldn’t you?

Needless to say I was admitted to the hospital that night.